Tag Archives: hope

Mended.

“One day, someone is going to hug you so tight that of your broken pieces fit back together.”
Part 3 of 3

Months were passing, and yet one day still loomed large on the calendar: that of my now very-cancelled wedding. I had very mixed feelings; mostly, I didn’t know what or how I should feel about it. Frankly, I was afraid to face it. How would I react? Would I be an emotional, teary mess? Angry? Nonplussed? Could I ignore the whole thing?

One of the things that drove me to write this whole messy story down is that when I was hovering at the brink, trying to decide whether to go through with the engagement or call it off, I couldn’t find any advice anywhere on the internet. Stories and blog postings fell into two camps: the “OMG he left me I’m ruined” camp and the “I hate men” camp. I was somewhere in the middle. Mostly, I was pretty much right back to where I was before I met Lenny, just… stronger. It wasn’t an external change, and a lot of times, it was hard to find internally, too. It was there, though. The past few days, I keep thinking about what Rafiki said in 1994’s The Lion King: “Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or… learn from it.”

It’s been a learning experience, and I kept moving forward. A blessing in disguise came in the form of an old friend who’d invited me to dinner at the end of the summer – my first co-ed outing in months. Conversation flowed easy between us despite the years since we’d last met, and allowed me to form a framework of trust -again, that learning- that there’s still hope.

So when the Big Day arrived, I awoke… cautiously. Like one does when injured, and is slowly sending bits of consciousness down each nerve and limb as though checking for damage, and assessing the conditions. I can’t say that my mind, my emotional well-being was a blank slate. There was a certain amount of sadness there, for what was. A lot of bitterness for what should have been and wasn’t, and a great deal of trepidation for what was to come.

I have said before, and I will say it again, I’m sure. I am eternally blessed in my family and my friends. My parents have been a wonderful rock of strength throughout this whole thing, as have my siblings and their significant others, and my friends have been there, from coast to coast, when I truly needed them. I received a gorgeous bouquet of flowers from one of my “bridesmaids” on the other side of the country, and my phone blew up with texts all day. (If any of y’all are reading this, you know who you are. I love you all.)

Without getting into details, let’s just say that beyond what I ever would have dreamed in my wildest daydreams, my afternoon and evening made me believe that there might be a second chance for me. And that feeling grows each any every day.

Hope.broken_heart_xlarge

Edit 10/11/16 – It has recently come to my attention that on the day vows were to be exchanged, he contacted my best friend via text. Now, for reasons I am unwilling to disclose, she and I were not speaking at the time. I had blocked him from my phone and FB, but email was still (then) a valid means of communication as there were still wedding-related loose ends to tie up and I needed a way to get a hold of him if necessary. Long story short, he asked how I was doing, (“I don’t know, I’m not speaking to her.” and told my friend that he thought HE had “dodged a bullet of crazy”. God bless my friends. For all that we weren’t speaking, she reamed him out, telling him that *I* was the one who had dodged a “bandoliers” of crazy and if he was that curious as to how I was doing, the time to ask would have been when I was standing on his porch, not five months after the fact. 

I love my friends.

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Filed under Personal

Not Cool, Southwest Air, Not Cool

Well, I can add Southwest to my list of “airlines I won’t fly”.

Folks, I’d like you to meet Daniel:

daniel

Daniel is three years old and suffers from a very rare neuromuscular disease. Unfortunately, his condition is terminal. His family has compiled a small bucket list in order to cram as much happiness into Daniel’s regrettably short life as they can. In order to help, the ever-wonderful Big Fluffy Dog Rescue, who apparently rescues sad humans as well as sad dogs (Daniel’s family adopted a dog from BFDR some time ago) has organized a trip to Talladega next month along with local PD, fans, and random people everywhere. According to Jeanne at BFDR:

“One of the things we thought we had covered were airline tickets from Baltimore to Birmingham. People offered to donate miles to help get them there.  Then Southwest Airlines decided to suck.” 

Southwest’s lame-o excuse? They only donate tickets to Make-a-Wish families, and Daniel has already been granted his wish. If people want to donate their miles, they’ll be charged. (Keep in mind that these aren’t miles that will cost Southwest anything; these are miles that others have already accrued and people want to donate and be kind. Just like donating gently used clothes. These are gently used miles. Sorta.) Why who uses these free miles should even matter to Southwest is beyond me, but charging for what should be free is unacceptable.

More from BFDR:

So, we’ll buy their tickets. We need to fundraise $3500 to buy this family of four tickets to get to Talladega. This is likely the last trip this family will take as Daniel is fading. We wanted him to have the trip all little boys want where he gets to see an honest to God NASCAR race up close and in person. We will make sure he gets it, even if Southwest Airlines sucks epicly. Our fans have already made this a trip of a lifetime, and this is the last piece of the puzzle.

Please spread the word and donate if you can. Feel free to spread the word that Southwest wanted to charge for donating miles to help a dying boy. If you would like to donate, please do so here: http://bigfluffydogs.com/pay-online.php. Make sure you email jean@bigfluffydogs.com after you donate and put the word “Daniel” in the subject line. I will post and let you know when we have what we need. Thanks for being the best fans in the world and helping a dying boy even when Southwest Airlines wants to profit from the well wishes of people.

 

So Delta had lost my business for their horrid customer service, and now Southwest has lost it for their complete and total Scrooge-itude. When a multi-million dollar company cannot stand the thought of its frequent fliers participating in charity, we have a major problem.

 

 

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Filed under awareness, current events, humanity, pro-life